My computer isn't that nervous... it's just a bit ANSI

If only women and kids only came with pull-down menus & online help

My computer's sick with a virus; I think my modem is a carrier

Honey, I Formatted the Kids

Your e-mail has been returned due to insufficient voltage

Justify my text ? I'm sorry, but it has no excuse

Finish your mail packet -- children are off-line in India

Never violate C:\ the Prime Directory

Multitasking is merely screwing up several things at once

If at first you don't succeed, call it beta version 0.91

Stack Error: Lost on a cluttered desk

Bug ??? That's not a bug, that's an undocumented feature

Terminal glare: A look that kills

I'm not a Webmaster, but I play one on UseNet

ZMODEM: Big bits, Soft blocks, Tighter ASCII

Life would be so much easier if I had the source code

Mommy !!! The cursor's winking at me !

Managing programmers is like herding cats

Do files get embarrassed when they get unzipped ?

Capt'n !!! The spellchecker kinna take this abuse !

C:\BELFRY is where I keep my .BAT file

ASCII to ASCII, DOS to DOS

"Mr. Worf, scan that ship" "Aye, Captain... 300 DPI ?"

! sgub evah t'nseod CP sihT ? sgub naem ayaddahW

E=Mc^5... Nah E=Mc^4... Nah E=Mc^3... Oh, the hell with it

Today's subliminal message is:

Profanity is the universal programming language

Calm down -- it is only ones and zeros after all

Computer analyst to programmer: "Start coding, I'll go find out what they want"