| Newfie Computer Terms |
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1. Log on: Make the wood stove hotter 2. Log off: Don't add no more wood 3. Monitor: Keep an eye on that wood stove 4. Download: Getting the firewood off the truck 5. Floppy disk: What you get from trying to carry too much firewood 6. Ram: The thing that splits the firewood 7. Hard Drive: Getting home in the winter 8. Prompt: What the mail ain't in the winter 9. Window: What to shut when it's cold outside 10. Screen: What to shut in black fly season 11. Byte: What the black flies do 12. Bit: What the black flies did 13. Mega Byte: What the LABRADOR black flies do 14. Chip: Munchies for TV 15. Micro Chip: What's left in the bag after you eat the chips 16. Modem: What you did to the hay fields 17. Dot Matrix: Old Dan Matrix's wife 18. Lap Top: Where the kitty sleeps 19. Software: The dumb plastic knives and forks they give you at McDonalds 20. Hardware: The real stainless steel cutlery 21. Mouse: What eats the grain in the barn 22. Main Frame: What holds the barn up 23. Enter: City talk for - "come on in, eh" 24. Web: What a spider makes 25. Web Site: The barn or the attic 26. Cursor: Someone who swears 27. Search Engine: What you do when the car dies 28. Screen Saver: A repair kit for the torn window screen 29. Home Page: A map you keep in your back pocket just in case you get lost in the field 30. Upgrade: Steep hill 31. Server: The person at the ABC what brings the food 32. Mail Server: The guy at the ABC what brings the food 33. MSDOS: Some new disease they discovered 34. Sound Card: One of them technological birthday cards that plays music when you open it 35. User: The neighbour who keeps borrowing stuff 36. Browser: What they call you when you eye brows grow together 37. Network: When you have to repair your fishing net 38. Internet: Complicated fish net repair method 39. Netscape: When a fish maneuvers out of reach 40. Online: When you get the laundry hung out on the washline 41. Off line: When the clothes pins let go and the laundry falls on the ground |
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